Thursday, October 03, 2013

my inner ward

The furnace is kicking on and already, in early October, I'm feeling dusty. It seems too early in the season to be schlumping about in my indoor jacket (which is really my outdoor jacket that I wear 24/7 when chill arrives).

Typically, spring and fall are my most creative seasons. I'm thinking that it might be a response to the pace of change around me. You know, leaves doing their time-lapse photography thing? Hail and sun breaks and wind? All the schlepping to and fro: school, soccer games, various health-related appointments. Inspiration wakes me up at 2:00 AM. New ideas surface as though immaculately conceived. Thoughts fragment into glassy shards, sprinkle like so much fairy dust and then disappear.

But this fall, something different. Leaden weight is pulling me to earth like a 1960's sit-com dad. Ward Cleaver in my brain, talking me out of my seasonal onslaught of half-baked ideas:

"Now, Suzy, you really haven't thought through your impulse to write a (insert screenplay, graphic novel, essay on the roller coaster of perimenopause), have you?"

"No, Dad, I haven't. I suppose I should revise the novel I've been working on for twenty years instead."

"Atta girl. You know, inspiration only gets you so far. Perspiration and tenacity are what will get you ahead in life."

"Gee, Dad, you really know how to rain on my parade."

So, mug of tea in hand, frumpishly shuffling along in my slippers, I survey the bulk of notes and papers relating to my aging work-in-progress. The furnace moves another layer dust around. This is the glamorous life of a writer.

What half-baked ideas are you talking yourself out of?

4 comments:

  1. Anonymous6:21 AM

    Oh god, I wish I had some half-baked ideas to talk myself out of. I tend to fully cook them so as to invest the maximum amount of wasted time in my projects. I'm ambitious that way.

    XO
    Averil

    ReplyDelete
  2. That's funny. Every time I think of moving forward with a half-baked idea or want to put the rush on something I always remember your wise words, "Measure twice, cut once."

    ReplyDelete

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