mother's day

Yesterday, Mother's Day, marked the end of our retreat, and, as Laura pointed out at brunch, "The first day of what's left of the rest of our lives."

This sentiment was repeated later in the afternoon, at the 4^th Annual Mothers Need Cocktails Party at Sheri Blue's house. Mothers gathered around the pear vodka and organic herb-infused mixers lamenting inertia and job dissatisfaction. "A toast to who the fuck knows what!"

As daughters of Mothers who may or may not have been Joni Mitchell Ladies of the Canyon types, or Joan Crawford highball types or, even, Joan Fontaine exotically depressed types, a lot of us, gals ranging in age from late thirties to early fifties, are feeling discontented and confused.

Our world-weary intuitive powers have been churned to death. We're overly competent, but shy to take what we want—lest we be branded, ala Hillary, power-hungry she-men. We're sick of being teachers, administrative side-kicks and support professionals. Some of us just want to be there for our kids when they come home from school, and be taken care of, financially, by spouses. Spend our days creating that lovely oasis, or painting, or writing or plucking weeds from the flower bed. Truly be, as Laura put it, CEOs of our families.

Then there are those of us who are still not giving up on the "save the world" dream. As long as it can be done part time. The entrepreneurial spirit is illusive. The idea of creating a new business sounds exciting, but largely overwhelming. The concept of the "life coach" is spreading like cover crop, with middle-aged women hanging shingles announcing that they have the secret formula to help other middle-aged women change their lives. A sisterhood of experts in professional coffee klatching.

All of us at the cocktail party, we're starting to be old enough to see kids we used to teach in the working world—engaging in messy relationships, unwanted pregnancies and Svengali bosses. We don't want to welcome young people we knew as children to be our peers, but, hey, who else is going to explain to us what "tagging" a photo in Facebook is.